We each have these critical moments that we reach in our lives. Fortunately, for some, it really happens earlier than later. For others...it takes years on years to reach that place. But we all reach that place. We all come to a single point where we know, deep inside the midst of our hearts, that things must change. This desire for change is like nothing you've ever experienced before. There is a different form of energy to it. There is a different feeling to it altogether.
You have to do the most frightening thing there's - face your greatest nightmare...yourself.
My moment arrived in late 2011 which wasn't by choice. I remember standing in that loft, hearing words that I would not forget, and literally watching myself from above crumble. I changed everything about myself in that minute. I compromised. I did everything I could. At the end, I'll never forget that deep burning feeling of turning to ashes. It wasn't the instant that did it, no, that was just the match. It was the entire mounting up of dry leaves and hay from many years of neglect...and that little match was everything in took to spark something that would redefine me from that moment on.
That was only the start, 7 days later, it reached its bottom. Definitely dead rock bottom. I made a request to the heavens in that completely black dark room, it wasn't granted, and I woke up the day after staring at a crumbled landscape...with the knowledge that I could reconstruct my entire world the way in which I wanted it.
But I would face myself.
More importantly, I would need to burn everything down that I ever supported myself with. I would need to learn the way to support myself for once, to not blame everything on others, to be fully responsible for my whole life, and to finally let everything that was locked up and caged in me out. It had to all come out.
You see, when you build walls to keep things out, you also build walls to keep the superb things in you from ever reaching any person out there looking to love you. Love was walled in...hurt was walled out. Discomfort was kept away from me...joy remained covered under the dust. I ran from fear...so my certainty and grounding avoided my life like the plague. I had to tear everything down. I had to tear my ego down. I had to tear down my projections. I had to rip apart everything and start over 100% fresh.
I did just that. I started writing. I started being truthful about what was going on with me. I built everything back, stone by stone on a different foundation. My backbone and my heart would be the dense iron place from which I'd create.
What I realized on the way was this - those places you are frightened to go, this is where your nightmare lives. It crawls around in that space. It's this thick dark oozing sort of discomfort that will shock you to death. It scares you because it makes you think that if you go there you will get caught in it and drown. The reality is, that's where your strength is. There's unimaginable amounts of strength in going there. Just as there's strength in great and hearty faith and light, there's equal amounts of strength in going to the place that ravishes your heart with fear...and yet when you go through those places you develop this type of belief in yourself that is beyond confidence. It's the kind of feeling that you know that everything around you might be demolished, and you could build it all back no matter the situation.
Power.
Real power.
"Take from me everything world, and I will come back and build it back better...and regardless of how you challenge me...I will absolutely continue to shine. "
Face your scariest nightmare. Face your fears. Don't be afraid to let everything go for the opportunity to build it back better. Need love in your life? You are going to have to let go of everything on the opposite end that is hindering you. You're going to have to dive deep down into the pit of your soul, lantern in hand, without the conquering blade. No shields. No weapon. No attempt to rise up above it.
You must go in naked and fully exposed.
You'll come out. You may cry, suffer, and hurt...but you'll come out. I'd never tell you to go anywhere that you couldn't actually come out of. I guarantee you, this is the one place you need to go for everything to release. To build something new, to begin to live the grandest adventure you could really ever live...you have to go here. The shadows. The depths. The darkness.
I can tell you...this place, is where life starts.
You have to do the most frightening thing there's - face your greatest nightmare...yourself.
My moment arrived in late 2011 which wasn't by choice. I remember standing in that loft, hearing words that I would not forget, and literally watching myself from above crumble. I changed everything about myself in that minute. I compromised. I did everything I could. At the end, I'll never forget that deep burning feeling of turning to ashes. It wasn't the instant that did it, no, that was just the match. It was the entire mounting up of dry leaves and hay from many years of neglect...and that little match was everything in took to spark something that would redefine me from that moment on.
That was only the start, 7 days later, it reached its bottom. Definitely dead rock bottom. I made a request to the heavens in that completely black dark room, it wasn't granted, and I woke up the day after staring at a crumbled landscape...with the knowledge that I could reconstruct my entire world the way in which I wanted it.
But I would face myself.
More importantly, I would need to burn everything down that I ever supported myself with. I would need to learn the way to support myself for once, to not blame everything on others, to be fully responsible for my whole life, and to finally let everything that was locked up and caged in me out. It had to all come out.
You see, when you build walls to keep things out, you also build walls to keep the superb things in you from ever reaching any person out there looking to love you. Love was walled in...hurt was walled out. Discomfort was kept away from me...joy remained covered under the dust. I ran from fear...so my certainty and grounding avoided my life like the plague. I had to tear everything down. I had to tear my ego down. I had to tear down my projections. I had to rip apart everything and start over 100% fresh.
I did just that. I started writing. I started being truthful about what was going on with me. I built everything back, stone by stone on a different foundation. My backbone and my heart would be the dense iron place from which I'd create.
What I realized on the way was this - those places you are frightened to go, this is where your nightmare lives. It crawls around in that space. It's this thick dark oozing sort of discomfort that will shock you to death. It scares you because it makes you think that if you go there you will get caught in it and drown. The reality is, that's where your strength is. There's unimaginable amounts of strength in going there. Just as there's strength in great and hearty faith and light, there's equal amounts of strength in going to the place that ravishes your heart with fear...and yet when you go through those places you develop this type of belief in yourself that is beyond confidence. It's the kind of feeling that you know that everything around you might be demolished, and you could build it all back no matter the situation.
Power.
Real power.
"Take from me everything world, and I will come back and build it back better...and regardless of how you challenge me...I will absolutely continue to shine. "
Face your scariest nightmare. Face your fears. Don't be afraid to let everything go for the opportunity to build it back better. Need love in your life? You are going to have to let go of everything on the opposite end that is hindering you. You're going to have to dive deep down into the pit of your soul, lantern in hand, without the conquering blade. No shields. No weapon. No attempt to rise up above it.
You must go in naked and fully exposed.
You'll come out. You may cry, suffer, and hurt...but you'll come out. I'd never tell you to go anywhere that you couldn't actually come out of. I guarantee you, this is the one place you need to go for everything to release. To build something new, to begin to live the grandest adventure you could really ever live...you have to go here. The shadows. The depths. The darkness.
I can tell you...this place, is where life starts.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement, a website dedicated to bringing the best quotes, motivational content on the web, and blogs all to one place. Need some more motivation and encouragement to keep moving forward? Dig into these life is too short quotes for a little bit of perspective on why you should drag yourself out of the darkness.
